Ireland

I had the amazing opportunity of a lifetime to go with my Aunt Dianne to Ireland. I had such a lovely time! I have never seen so much beauty in nature!! There are so many great stories and experiences to tell. I left with a much deeper appreciation for God's creativity and can't wait to see more of His beautiful world. I know, instead of me rambling on and on in a blog, why don't you just come over and I will show you my pictures and visit about the trip? :)

spring

this past year has been a time of growth and change for me. i have had some rough spots and some glorious victories. i have been thinking about these things for the past couple of months and remembering what God has brought me through. i believe He has, and will continue to use His creation to remind me of His goodness towards me.

this is such a lovely time of year. everything is emerging from the dormant state and is beginning to blossom and bloom all around us. ***warning, cheese ball alert*** i kind of feel that i am coming out of a dormant state as well. whether it has to do with growth and change, some beautiful words spoken over me several months ago, the time of year, or a combination of all three, i feel that i am in a wonderful place right now!!! i am almost giddy with anticipation of the good things He has in store for me! i know without a doubt that this will be my best year yet.

i have also been thinking that with spring time comes storms. the past two weeks God has been speaking to me about storms and then last week at church that's what Pastor Steve spoke about. there is something that God is wanting me to grasp. what is it exactly? well, i have realized that for me, anticipating the storm is sometimes way worse than the actual storm. i have also been thinking about how people say things like "hold on til the morning comes" or "when the storm is over..." but actually, the sun is always shining. even during storms and dark times. we may not be able to see it or feel it, but it is always there just above the storms. and God is always with us. He has promised that He will never leave us and that He will stick closer than a brother. and just like He gave Noah the rainbow as a sign that He would never flood the whole earth again, He has promised us that He will never put more on us than we can bear. (someone please remind me of this the next time i am going through!)

i know that we all go through things and sometimes those are the times when God speaks to our hearts more clearly than others. my prayer is that i continue to find the beauty in God's creation and that when the storms of life do come, i will make the choice to dance in the rain with gratitude and in anticipation of His promises. Lord i thank You for where You have brought me from and praise You for where You are taking me. thank You for transforming into Your likeness with an ever-increasing glory. may my life bring You honor and glory. amen.

p.s. here is a picture of the rainbow i saw after the storms we had the other day. i took it with my phone and i was driving, so it's not the best, but you get the idea :)

my Beloved

i've been so busy the past couple of weeks with homework and will be for the next couple of weeks. and yes, i should be doing homework at this very moment. but i have been thinking about this passage of scripture a lot lately and i thought i would write a bit about it. it's Song of Solomon 2:10-15...

"My beloved speaks and says to me: 'Arise, my love, my beautiful one, and come away, for behold the winter is past; the rain is over and gone. The flowers appear on the earth, the time of singing has come, and the voice of the turtledove is heard in our land. The fig tree ripens it's figs, and the vines are in blossom; they give forth fragrance. Arise, my love, my beautiful one, and come away. O my dove, in the clefts of the rock, in the crannies of the cliff, let me see your face, let me hear your voice, for your voice is sweet, and your face is lovely. Catch the foxes for us, the little foxes that spoil the vineyards, for our vineyards are in blossom.'"

there is so much to say about this passage! i love the beautiful illustration of God's creativity and splendor displayed in nature. He is so amazing to me. i love that he calls us His love, His beautiful one, and His dove! He longs to see our faces and hear our voices.

it seems that He has created the trees and flowers as a way for us to see His love for us and as another way for us to connect with Him. and in His presence there is nourishment (figs) and there is companionship and love waiting to be poured on us!

but catch the little foxes that spoil the vineyards. catch every little thing that would try to pull our attention elsewhere, to get our focus off of Him. for me it is busyness. i have to catch that little fox and make sure that i am not neglecting my Beloved. and oh what a blessed time when i am in His presence! there is fullness of joy and pleasures forevermore!

oh, can't you just hear him calling to you "Arise, my beloved, my beautiful one, and come away..." so what are you waiting for? spend some time with Him. i promise you won't be disappointed!

p.s. my friend Tara took this picture this week and it is just a little taste of His glory.

free to...

free to love
free to weep
free to hurt
free to forgive
free to mourn
free to heal
free to rejoice
free to throw my head back and give a good belly laugh
free to be a friend
free to live in peace
free to mother
free to nurture
free to praise
free to be silly
free to tickle my sweet girl
free to love my Savior with all of my soul
free to live

open heart

so my pastor has us make a list at the beginning of the year of things that we want God to do in our lives. for the past 3 years my husband has been on the list. the first year it was "let me know if it's Your will for me to have a husband." the next year, after confirmation from many people and other sources, husband was on there with a few other things like let him have a worshipful heart, wants kids, etc. then last year a few more items were added to my list like that he would come find me when we are both ready and that we would both have confirmation around the same time. when making out my list for this year (and i have several other things on there, not just about my husband fyi. like last year i had em's salvation and sure enough, she asked Jesus to come live in her heart!) i kept feeling that God was wanting me to ask that my husband come this year. i kept talking myself out of it by saying that God has His own timetable and that He will send him to me when it's time. but over and over again i kept feeling like God was wanting me to put that on the list. so i did.

i have thought a lot about it since then. why didn't i really want to put that on the list? what was it that was keeping me from being totally honest and open with Him? well, honestly, mostly b/c i didn't want to be disappointed. i didn't want to let myself be that vulnerable to anyone, even God. i was afraid of getting hurt. i still struggle with the faith of it all.

but this whole time that's exactly what God was wanting from me. to trust Him completely. to stand on His promises. to be vulnerable to Him and tell Him the real desire of my heart. He desires that deep intimacy with me and the relationship that says it's ok to be vulnerable to Him. here are the things i know: that He is faithful and has good plans never to harm me. those who trust in Him will never be put to shame, and He will give me the desires of my heart. how could i not trust Him with my heart?!

so here i am God. my heart is in Your hands. i am trusting You with my life and my future. i know that You do have Your own timetable, but i've let you know my real desires. i will keep waiting and trusting You everyday for Your promises and thanking You for what You've already done.

Great Love

I love You
like the dry ground loves the rain.
I love You
like the flowers love the sun.
You're my first Love.
You are the One!

I am Yours, You are mine.
My great Love for all time.
I am Yours, You are mine.
Let my soul testify!

I love You
like the horses love the prairie.
I love You
like the eagles love the sky.
You're my Beloved.
You are my Desire!

I am Yours, You are mine.
My great Love for all time.
I am Yours, You are mine.
May my life glorify!

friends

i am blessed with several good friends. and not just people who i occasionally hang out with, but people who i know that i can count on to have my back. my "through thick and thin" friends :) i love that God loves me through my friends. there are some friendships that have been a slow progression and some that were instant bonds. there are some that have yet to take seed. so whatever category you may fit into in my friend spectrum, you are an answer to prayer and i'm very grateful for you! and i'm most thankful for my Friend that sticks closer to me than a brother! here's to a great year of old and new friendships!